Why friendships are so important for your health

You may have recently heard about a new public health issue sweeping the country. According to the U.S. Surgeon General, Americans are lonely, and it’s hurting their health.

Research has shown that nearly half of Americans feel lonely or isolated. And those feelings are doing real harm. According to one report, people who lack social connection may increase their risk of premature death as much as people who smoke 15 cigarettes a day.

The power of connection

Good friends are good for your health. Friends can help you celebrate good times and provide support during bad times. They help prevent isolation and loneliness and give you a chance to offer your support and friendship to someone. Friends also can:

  • Increase your sense of belonging and purpose.
  • Boost your happiness and reduce your stress.
  • Improve your self-confidence and self-worth.
  • Help you cope with trauma, like divorce, serious illness, job loss or the death of a loved one.
  • Encourage you to change unhealthy lifestyle habits, like drinking too much alcohol or not exercising enough.

Friends also play an important role in promoting your overall health. Adults with strong social connections have a lower risk of many health problems, including depression, high blood pressure and an unhealthy body mass index (BMI).

In fact, studies have found that people who have meaningful relationships and social support are likely to live longer than those with fewer connections.

Tips for making new friends — or reconnecting with old ones

If you are lonely or isolated, it can be hard to meet new friends. But there are lots of small steps you can take to broaden your circle. For example:

  • Reach out to old friends. Just because you haven’t spoken in a while doesn’t mean you can’t reconnect.
  • Make time to connect with family members.
  • Introduce yourself to your neighbors — including the kids!
  • Make an effort to meet friends of friends. If there’s someone you’d like to know better, ask a mutual friend to introduce you.
  • Go to places where people are gathered, like coffee shops, gyms or parks.

How to meet new people

Be open to using a variety of opportunities to meet people. For example, try several of these ideas:

  • Get involved in your community. Look for groups and activities that focus on an interest or hobby. Options include book clubs, art classes, hiking groups or even groups that try new restaurants.
  • Volunteer your time. Offer your time or talents at a hospital, place of worship, museum, community center, charitable group or other organization. You can form strong connections when you work with people who have mutual interests.
  • Get social. Invite a friend to join you for coffee or lunch. When you’re invited to a social gathering, say yes, even if it makes you nervous. Contact someone who recently invited you to an activity and return the favor.
  • Try something new. Take a class at your local college or community center to meet people who have similar interests. Join a class at a local gym or community fitness facility.
  • Join a faith community. Take advantage of special activities and get-to-know-you events for new members.
  • Go outside. Chat with neighbors who also are out and about. Or head to a popular park and strike up conversations there.

Be patient as your friendships grow

Building new friendships takes time. Make an effort to see new friends regularly. Check in with them in between meeting up.

You may feel awkward the first few times you talk on the phone or get together, but this feeling will pass as you get more comfortable with each other.

If you’re still nervous, manage your nerves with mindfulness. Each time you’re tempted to stay home because you imagine a social event going badly, pay attention to what actually happens. You may notice that the scenarios you fear usually don’t happen.

When embarrassing situations do happen, remind yourself that your feelings will pass and you can handle them until they do.

Remember, it’s never too late to create new friendships or reconnect with old friends. Investing time in making friends and strengthening your friendships can pay off in better health and a brighter outlook for years to come.

  1. Our epidemic of loneliness and isolation. The U.S. Surgeon General’s advisory on the healing effects of social connection and community. U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. https://www.hhs.gov/surgeongeneral/priorities/connection/index.html. Accessed Aug. 20, 2023.
  2. The loneliness epidemic persists: A post-pandemic look at the state of loneliness among U.S. Adults. Cigna Corporation. https://newsroom.thecignagroup.com/loneliness-epidemic-persists-post-pandemic-look. Accessed Aug. 20, 2023.
  3. Holt-Lunstad J, et al. Advancing social connection as a public health priority in the United States. American Psychology. 2017; doi:10.1037/amp0000103.
  4. Holt-Lunstad J. Loneliness and social isolation as risk factors: The power of social connection in prevention. American Journal of Lifestyle Medicine. 2021; doi:10.1177/15598276211009454.
  5. Suragarn U, et al. Approaches to enhance social connection in older adults: An integrative review of literature. Aging and Health Research. 2021; doi:10.1016/j.ahr.2021.100029.
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  7. Loneliness and social isolation — Tips for staying connected. National Institute on Aging. https://www.nia.nih.gov/health/loneliness-and-social-isolation-tips-staying-connected. Accessed Sept. 8, 2023.
  8. Bystritsky A. Complementary and alternative treatments for anxiety symptoms and disorders: Physical, cognitive, and spiritual interventions. https://www.uptodate.com/contents/search. Accessed Sept. 8, 2023.
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