Migraine: Managing the misperceptions

"It's just a headache. Can't you take an aspirin?"

"Why can't you come to work? You don't look sick."

"If you'd just get more sleep, you'd feel better."

If you have migraines, you've likely heard comments like these. Because migraine is an invisible condition, friends, family and co-workers may downplay your pain or assume you're exaggerating how migraines affect your life.

Of course, you know that your migraines are more than "just a headache." But it can be frustrating when others don't understand. You may feel lonely, misunderstood, isolated or even guilty.

Fortunately, there are several ways you can take control and gain the support you need.

Get friends and family on board

Help your family, friends and co-workers understand your migraines and how they affect you.

• Explain your diagnosis. Share information about migraines, using facts and medical resources. Tell them how migraine affects your life. You can help reduce the stigma of migraine by speaking out.
• Share your frustration. Point out that you want to be able to go to work, have lunch with friends and do the other things you enjoy — but sometimes your migraines get in the way.
• Pull in your partner. Migraines can put a strain on relationships. Keeping open lines of communication can help. Instead of "protecting" your partner, talk openly about what you need when migraines hit, like help with meals or housework.
• Talk to your kids. Explain your migraines in simple terms. For instance, tell them that your head hurts sometimes and you may need medicine or alone time to rest when it does. Reassure children that it's not their fault.
• Be honest at work. Talk to your supervisor about your condition, and how it affects you. Explain that you may have to take breaks to stretch or get something to eat to manage your migraine triggers.

Stand up for yourself

Counter common migraine misconceptions by standing up for yourself and getting the resources you need.

• Ask for support. Tell your loved ones that their understanding is important to you.
• Lean on experience. Reach out to support groups and others who understand. People who've experienced migraines can offer emotional support and advice for coping with the condition.
• Make a work plan. Ask how your employer can help accommodate your migraines. For instance, is it possible to work flexible hours? Offer to make up lost time if you have to take days off from work.
• Think ahead. Find a back-up person to help with tasks, like picking up kids from school, when migraines keep you grounded at home.

Ultimately, you may have to accept that not everyone will understand your migraine experience. But educating others, countering misconceptions and spending time with people who care can make a big difference.