Alzheimer's: Helping children understand the disease

Alzheimer's affects everyone in the family — including the kids. Reassure your child with simple, honest explanations of the disease. By Mayo Clinic Staff

Watching a loved one progress through the stages of Alzheimer's disease can be frightening, even for adults. Imagine being a child struggling to understand why grandma is acting so strangely or can't remember who you are. You can help by offering comfort and support when needed.

Anticipate your child's questions

When your child asks questions, respond with simple, honest answers. For example:

  • What's wrong with grandma? Explain that Alzheimer's is a disease. Just as children get colds and tummy aches, older adults sometimes get an illness that causes them to act differently and to forget things. They might look the same on the outside, but their brains are changing on the inside.
  • Doesn't grandpa love me anymore? If the person who has Alzheimer's disease no longer recognizes your child, he or she might feel rejected. Remind your child that the disease makes it hard for your loved one to remember things — but your child is still an important part of the person's life.
  • Is it my fault? If the person who has Alzheimer's accuses your child of some wrongdoing — such as misplacing a purse or keys — your child might feel responsible. Explain to your child that he or she isn't to blame.
  • Will you get Alzheimer's? Reassure your child that Alzheimer's disease isn't contagious. Most people don't get Alzheimer's.
  • What will happen next? If you'll be caring for the person who has Alzheimer's in your home, prepare your child for the changes in routine. Explain to your child that your loved one will have good days and bad days. Reassure your child that he or she is loved — no matter what the future holds.

If your child has trouble talking about the situation or withdraws from your loved one, open the conversation. Ask what changes your child has noticed in the loved one who has Alzheimer's disease. Your child's observations might lead naturally to an exploration of his or her own feelings and worries. Tell your child it's OK to feel nervous, sad or angry. You feel that way sometimes, too.

To boost your child's understanding of Alzheimer's, read age-appropriate books on the disease or take advantage of other educational resources.

Jun. 02, 2012 See more In-depth