Alzheimer's blog

When caregivers share fears and pain, door opens for hope

By Angela Lunde September 10, 2014

In our day-to-day interactions, we rarely express our secrets, all of our true emotions, or let people see our real life or self — for acceptable reasons.

But it happens here on this blog — many of you boldly admitting, owning and sharing thoughts, desires, insecurities, pain, embarrassment, vulnerability, alienation, fear, dreams and more.

As a caregiver to someone with a dementia, most of you will have many of these emotions and it can be the negative ones that consume us. So, the question isn't whether or not you (we) experience fear, pain and other emotions. The more important question is: How do you move through these emotions in an honest way so they don't paralyze, break or keep you from being who you really are?

The way we transform our insecurities, sorrow and other difficult emotions is by admitting them, owning and expressing them. This is what takes place here by so many of you. When you open up and reveal fear and pain, or the ways in which you feel flawed or imperfect, a piece of the struggle goes out of life. A door is opened for hope, joy and relief to enter.

Something else extraordinary happens — you make it safe for others to reciprocate and share their own stories of struggle. You reclaim what's important in our life — to be a part of the (imperfect) human family.

Through this blog community I witness a beautiful synergy between the sharing of our truth and space for compassion and happiness to enter. I see a place where we learn about others, and at the same time we learn more about ourselves.

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Sept. 10, 2014